The Lost Crowns
Juliette Lenart
page 30 of 49

New page

He stood on the ridge, the grey at his back, the world ahead of him spread like a map that had been painted by a hand that knew colors he had never seen. Below him, the land fell away in gentle slopes, the green of the canopy broken by the silver threads of rivers, the gold of clearings where the light gathered in pools that seemed to glow from within. And at the edge of his vision, where the slope met the horizon, there was a line of green so deep it was almost black, a wall of trees that rose like the rampart of a city he had never entered.

The forest.

He had been walking toward it since the morning, since the hollow between the tree roots, since the dew that had not been tears, since the first moment he had seen the fog and had not understood that it was not following him but was him. The forest had been a distant smudge, a rumor of green that he had kept at the edge of his awareness, a destination that he had not allowed himself to hope for because hope was a thing that had been drained from the hollow behind his sternum, replaced by the cold certainty of the erasure that was spreading from his chest.

But now the forest was close.

Close enough that he could see the individual trees, the way their trunks rose straight and thick, the way their branches interlaced above the ground, the way the light that fell on them was not the shifting gold and silver of the sky but something else, something that seemed to belong to the trees themselves, a green that was not reflected but emitted, a glow that came from the leaves and the bark and the air between them.

He looked down at his hands.

The ring was cool on his smallest finger, the metal pressing against his skin with a weight that was familiar now, a weight that had been there since the moment he had opened the hidden space in the wall on Sunset Boulevard, since the moment he had touched the crown and felt the first song of the heirlooms enter his blood.

He looked at the ring.

The metal was not tarnished, not scratched, not marked by the hours of walking, by the sweat that had dried on his palms, by the cold that had settled into his fingers as he had climbed the ridge. It was perfect, unmarked, as if it had been forged moments before, as if it had been waiting for him to look at it, to see it, to understand what it was.

He did not understand.

He was not ready.

He turned his gaze from the ring to the forest, to the green that was waiting for him, to the boundary that lay between the grey scab of the erasure and the living pulse of the trees that were taller than any building he had ever entered.

The grey was moving.

He felt it before he saw it, a pressure at his back, a shift in the air that was not wind but the displacement of the thing that was following, the thing that was hungry, the thing that had been growing since the moment he had crossed the veil.

He turned.

The fog was no longer a wall.

It was a wave.

A wall of silver that rose higher than the trees that it had consumed, that curled at its crest like the waves that Norland had seen from the bone-white shore, the waves that had not moved, the waves that had been still for a thousand years because the sea that had held them was no longer a sea but a memory.

But this wave was moving.

It was moving toward him.

The crest was the same silver-grey that had been the membrane, that had been the cut between the world he stood in and the nothing that had swallowed the road behind him. But the body of the wave was darker, the grey deepening as it rose, the color of the storm clouds that had gathered over the Santa Monica Mountains on the days when the air was heavy with the promise of rain that never came.

He heard the sound.

It was not a roar, not the crash of water against rock, not the howl of wind through the canyons that he knew. It was a hum, a vibration that he felt in his teeth, in the bones of his skull, in the hollow behind his sternum where the hope had drained and the truth was beginning to gather.

The hum was the song of the heirlooms.

The hum was the frequency of the erasure.

The hum was the sound of the world being unmade.

He did not think.

His feet moved before his mind could form the command, his boots finding the slope of the ridge, the descent that he had climbed moments before, the rocks that had been his handholds now slipping beneath his soles as he scrambled down, as he half-ran, half-fell toward the green that was waiting at the base of the ridge.

The wave did not pause.

It crested the ridge behind him, the grey spilling over the top of the rock, the silver cascading down the slope like water that had been held back by a dam that had just given way, like the flood that Norland had never seen but had imagined when he had read the newspaper articles about the dams that had broken in the mountains, the dams that had been built by men who had believed they could hold back the weight of the world.

The grey was faster than he was.

He felt it at his heels, the cold of it seeping through the leather of his boots, the vibration of it humming through the ground beneath his feet, the song of it matching the song of the heirlooms in a harmony that was not harmony but dissonance, a sound that was two notes that were the same but not the same, that were trying to become one note but could not, that were grinding against each other like the teeth of a creature that was chewing the world.

He ran.

He had not run since the day he had left the vault, since the moment he had stepped through the gap that had been the doors of the palace that was now dissolving, since the moment he had understood that the exile was not a single moment but a walk, a walk that had led him to this ridge, to this descent, to this sprint toward the green that was still a hundred paces away, still a distance that he could not close fast enough.

His breath was a raw sound in his throat, his lungs burning with the effort, his legs moving in a rhythm that was not the rhythm of the walk that had carried him through the pity of the elves but something else, something that was the rhythm of survival, of the body that knew what the mind did not want to admit, that the grey was not a thing that he could outwalk, that the erasure was not a thing that he could test, that the wave was a thing that would catch him, that would consume him, that would leave nothing behind but the smooth grey surface of the seal that had already closed over his footprints.

He did not look back.

He did not need to.

The cold was on his neck, on the exposed skin between his collar and his hair, the cold that was not the cold of the stream or the cold of the dew that had not been tears but the cold of the void, the cold of the thing that was the absence of everything, the cold of the erasure that was reaching for him, that was brushing against the edge of his jacket, that was curling around the white thread that the seamstress had stitched into the hem.

He ran.

The trees were forty paces away.

He could see the bark now, the pale silver-grey streaked with gold veins that caught the light from a sun that seemed to hang in a different season, that seemed to be the sun of a world that was not the world he had left, not the world of the still sea and the palace that had dissolved, not the world of the pity that had followed him along the coastal road, but a world that was older, deeper, more alive than anything he had ever known.

The trees were thirty paces away.

The air between them was different, warmer, wetter, the scent of it reaching him even as he ran, the scent of earth that had been wet by rain that had fallen in a rhythm that was not the rhythm of the world he knew, the scent of leaves that had been growing for centuries, the scent of something that was alive in a way that he could not name, could not describe, could only breathe.

The trees were twenty paces away.

The cold at his neck was sharper now, the hum louder, the dissonance between the song of the heirlooms and the song of the erasure building into a chord that was almost a scream, a sound that was not sound but pressure, a sound that was pressing against his eardrums, against his sinuses, against the hollow behind his sternum where the truth was beginning to gather.

The trees were ten paces away.

He could see the roots now, the roots that were as thick as his torso, that rose from the earth in curves that were not the curves of the roots he knew, the roots that were the color of the pale silver-grey bark, that were veined with the same gold that caught the light, that were alive in a way that made him think of the pulse he had felt when he had pressed his palm against the trunk of the tree that had not yet been consumed, the pulse that had been slow and deep and warm.

The trees were five paces away.

He leaped.

His body rose from the ground, his arms reaching forward, his hands outstretched toward the trunk of the nearest tree, toward the bark that was warm, toward the gold veins that were catching the light, toward the entrance to the forest that was the only thing that was not grey, the only thing that was not the erasure, the only thing that was still alive.

His hands hit the trunk.

The impact was a shock that ran up his arms, through his shoulders, into his chest, the force of it driving the air from his lungs, the bark rough against his palms, the warmth of it seeping into his skin like the heat of a fire that had been burning for a thousand years.

He did not fall.

He clung to the trunk, his fingers finding the ridges of the bark, the grooves that were not the grooves of the trees he knew, the grooves that seemed to have been carved by a hand that had known exactly where his fingers would land, that had known exactly how he would grip, that had known exactly what he would need to hold on to the world that was still alive.

He turned.

The wave was at the edge of the tree line.

The grey crest had curled as it descended the ridge, the silver cascading down the slope in a flood that had consumed the rock, the moss, the earth, the air. It had reached the base of the ridge, the place where the slope met the level ground, the place where the first roots of the nearest tree reached into the soil.

And it stopped.

The grey did not cross the line of the tree roots.

It hung at the edge of the forest, the crest of the wave still curled, the body of it still churning, the mass of it still pressing forward with the hunger that Norland had felt at his heels, that had been the cold at his neck, that had been the vibration in his teeth.

But it did not cross.

The roots of the tree were a boundary that the grey could not pass, a line that the erasure could not cross, a threshold that the fog could not enter.

He stared at the place where the grey met the green, at the line that was as sharp as the cut that had been the membrane, at the boundary that was as clean as the severance between the moss and the silver, between the bark and the grey, between the world he stood in and the nothing that had swallowed the road behind him.

But this time the line was holding.

The grey pressed against the tree line, the surface of it pulsing with the rhythm that was the song of the heirlooms, the rhythm that was the hum that had been following him, the rhythm that was the frequency of the erasure.

The trees did not move.

The roots did not yield.

The bark did not begin to grey.

The forest accepted him.

He felt the acceptance not as a thought but as a sensation, a warmth that spread from the trunk through his palms, through his arms, through his chest, into the hollow behind his sternum where the cold had been gathering, where the truth had been pressing against the walls of his understanding.

The warmth did not fill the hollow.

It warmed it.

It softened the edges of the cold, made the weight of it easier to carry, made the shape of it less sharp, less cutting, less like the blade that had been the verdict of the queen of the still sea.

He let go of the trunk.

His hands dropped to his sides, the palms raw from the impact, the fingers trembling with the effort of the sprint, the legs shaking with the release of the tension that had been carrying him since he had heard the hum of the wave cresting the ridge behind him.

He stood at the edge of the green.

The grey pressed against the tree line, a wall of silver that rose higher than the trees that stood behind him, that curled at its crest like a wave that had been frozen in the moment before it broke, that hung in the air like a held breath, like a promise that was waiting, like a hunger that would not be satisfied until he stepped back into the world that it was consuming.

He did not step back.

He turned.

He walked deeper into the forest, his boots finding the earth that was not packed and smooth but soft, the soil rich with the decay of a thousand seasons, the roots of the trees rising and falling beneath his feet like the waves of a sea that was not the still sea but a sea that was alive, that was breathing, that was holding him in the rhythm of its breath.

He walked.

The trees rose around him, their trunks the width of the cars that he had left behind, their bark the pale silver-grey that was streaked with gold, their branches interlacing above him in a canopy that filtered the light from the sun that seemed to hang in a different season, that seemed to be a sun that had been burning for a longer time than the sun he knew, that seemed to be a sun that had watched the growth of these trees from the moment the first seed had split and the first root had reached into the soil.

He walked.

The air was warm and wet and organic, the scent of it filling his lungs with the memory of the greenhouse that his mother had kept in the conservatory of the house that had been his grandmother's, the greenhouse where the orchids had bloomed in profusion, where the ferns had unfurled their fronds in the moist air, where the light had fallen through the glass in a way that had made the world inside the conservatory feel separate from the world outside, felt like a pocket of a different season, a different climate, a different world.

He walked.

The sound of the forest was a hum that was not the hum of the erasure, not the dissonance that had been the song of the heirlooms grinding against the song of the grey. It was a hum that was deeper, slower, the hum of the living wood that was breathing, that was growing, that was aware of him and was waiting for him to make the next move.

He stopped.

He had reached a clearing.

The trees that had been so close, so dense, so pressing that he had felt the weight of them on his shoulders, on his chest, on the hollow behind his sternum where the truth was gathering, drew back at the clearing’s edge, their branches pulling away from the sky as if they had been trained by a hand that knew how to shape the architecture of light and shadow. The opening was not large, the space the size of the room that had been the vault, the room where the heirlooms had sat for a hundred years, the room where the song had been waiting for him, the room where he had first crossed the veil.

In the center of the clearing was a pool.

The water was still, the surface the color of the silver that had been the threads of the seamstress's work, that had been the walls of the palace that had dissolved, that had been the crest of the wave that had been frozen at the edge of the tree line.

He approached the pool.

He knelt at the edge.

The water was clear, the bottom visible through the still surface, the stones that lined the bottom the color of the gold that streaked the bark of the trees, the color of the light that seemed to hang in a different season.

He reached out his hand.

His fingers touched the surface of the water.

The cold was not the cold of the erasure, not the cold of the void, not the cold of the thing that was the absence of everything. It was a cold that was the cold of water that had never been touched, that had been lying in the pool since before the first human had set foot on the soil of the other world, that had been waiting for him to touch it, to feel it, to understand what it was.

He cupped the water.

He raised it to his lips.

He drank.

The water was cold and clean and tasted of nothing that he could name, nothing that he had ever tasted, nothing that he had ever known. It was the taste of the forest, of the living wood, of the pulse that he had felt in the bark, of the hum that was the voice of the trees.

He lowered his hands.

He looked down at the surface of the pool.

He saw his own face.

The face that had been the face that he had seen in the mirror of his apartment, the face that had been the face that he had seen in the window of the car that had driven him to UCLA, the face that had been the face that he had seen in the reflection of the sea that had not moved, the face that had been the face that he had seen in the moment before the palace had dissolved, the face that was the face of a man who had been exiled, who had been marked, who was walking through a world that was not his.

But the face was not alone.

Behind his face, in the reflection that was not his reflection, there was another face.

The face of a woman.

She was pale, her skin the color of the silver that had been the threads of the seamstress's work, her hair the color of the gold that streaked the bark of the trees, her eyes the color of the green that was the deep, breathing green of the forest that was holding him.

She was looking at him.

Not with surprise.

Not with fear.

Not with the pity that had been the stones on the cairn of his defeat.

She was looking at him with an expression that he could not name, that he had never seen, that he had never known existed in the vocabulary of faces that he had learned, the faces that he had read, the faces that he had interpreted through the lens of the ledgers and the meetings and the deals that had been the architecture of his life.

She was looking at him with recognition.

As if she had been expecting him for a very long time.

As if she had known that he would come.

As if she had been waiting for him to arrive.

He jerked upright.

The water rippled, the surface breaking, the reflection of the woman dispersing into the waves that spread from the place where his hands had been, the waves that carried the image of her face outward in rings that grew wider and fainter until they reached the edge of the pool and disappeared.

He stared at the surface.

His own face returned, his eyes wide, his mouth open, his breath coming in short, sharp bursts that were not the rhythm of the forest, not the hum of the living wood, not the pulse that he had felt in the bark.

The woman was gone.

The reflection was gone.

But the image of her face was burned into his vision, into the space behind his eyes, into the hollow behind his sternum where the truth was gathering, where the cold was warming, where the hope was beginning to stir.

He did not know who she was.

He did not know whether what he had seen was a vision or a hallucination or a truth.

But he knew, with a certainty that settled into his bones like cold water, that he was going to step deeper into that forest.

Whether it was magic or madness.

Because the grey void behind him was death.

And the green pulse ahead was something he had never felt before.

It was a question.

And for the first time in his life, Norland wanted an answer more than he wanted safety.

He stood.

He turned.

He walked deeper into the forest, the trees closing around him, the canopy thickening above him, the hum of the living wood rising to meet the rhythm of his steps, the pulse of the bark joining the beat of his heart, the warmth of the air filling his lungs with the memory of the greenhouse, the memory of the orchids, the memory of the light that had fallen through the glass in a way that had made the world inside the conservatory feel separate from the world outside.

The forest accepted him.

And behind him, the grey pressed against the tree line, a wall of silver that could not pass, a wave that could not break, a hunger that could not be satisfied.

But he did not look back.